The problems pizza causes

Some say marriage is a true test of patience. I say no you are wrong- husbands who make their lazy wives go out on a cold, wet and dark night and make em walk are the truest test of patience and a direct descendant of devil himself. Me and the said person head out to the city of Stirling for a celebratory meal. I held my ground till 8 so all the restaurants were full and we settle for a take away pizza He parks the car faaaar away and makes me walk (!!!!) through the cold cold streets of Stirling thats beauty is covered by the dark dark night.

We go up a narrow, poorly lit and people-less cobbled path. I spot the first homeless man and I put my head down knowing whats coming next. (Live in the country side and miss all the homeless people: Archana -1 Universe- 0. Go to the city for celebratory meal and I will show you what youve been missing: Universe- 1 Archana- 0)

We head up the street, and see another homeless man and then another one and then another and then another one in the space of a minute. Great.

We also find a pizza place, goes in, puts in an order, told to wait 15 mins and the devils descendant makes the lazy lady walk around the same freaking place AGAIN. Amazing.

We pass by the 1st homeless guy, the 2nd, the 3rd…”Have a good night”….Sterry walks back a few steps and gives the ‘polite homeless man’ some spare….and the 4th.

We go back in after 15 mins and decided to eat our pizza there. I cut up the rest of the pizza slices and looks up at my partner who was contemplating having cold pizza the next morning, with a smile and a half-sorry look.

On our way out Sterry full heartedly agrees to give some slices to the people sitting outside. We pass by the 1st man who was sitting near a pub. I hesitate. I make up an excuse not to go to him and walk on. I see the next man, offers him a slice, and the third and the fourth. I walk down the street carrying 2 pieces of left over pizza for my man to devour the next day and head filled with satisfaction that these guys accepted my pizza offer. Just before they go out of my sight, I take a sneaky look back and see one of them still eating the pizza. Dopamine running high and all smiles. But then a wave a thought occurs: ‘you offered a pizza slice to 3 men on the street. Pretty amazing thing. You go girl!!! But erm….there kinda was another man…who did not get a slice…erm…ok…right…shit…great….well done man well done….you handpicked the men who were worthy of getting a pizza slice’

In a world where theres plently of homeless individuals and others in need…there will be plenty of compassionate people whod want to help. But its still a game of survival of the fittest and politics. I offered 3 men a slice of pizza but for the 1st one, i offered him a subconscious excuse: ‘you are sitting near a pub, you will get more collections and I also saw you getting a cigarette of someone earlier on so you are not worthy of a slice’

Pizza.

Causing problems since day 1!!!

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Its all about me and my facial hair

So, Ive been supporting a 5 year old rather intelligent and recently bereaved young boy for over 4 months. His mum had recently died after battling cancer for almost all her life. I met him twice before his mum died. He wasnt shy about showing his apprehension in meeting me then and expressing an understandable reluctance in talking to me about his feelings about mummys death.

After nearly 2 months after his mums death, him and his primary carer granny came to meet me. I was pleased to see him and being a social worker and all that, I knelt down and bent down to his eye level. When saying hello and bladdy-bladdy to him, he pointed his finger towards his chin. I immediately leaned back and touched my chin, quietly asking ‘have i got something on my face’ whilst dying inside thinking ‘shiiiitt a 5 year old just spotted your chin hair. This is what you get for being lazy and not taking care of your shit’, but he calmly shook his head and opened his mouth to show me something thats even bigger deal than an insignficant womans facial hair- a visit from tooth fairy. Hed lost his first tooth!!

You know when we ask someone, especially a child, ‘how are youuu’ with squeaky voice and animated eyes, are we really.. like really really interested in their response apart from their ‘fines and oks and goods’ or are we just interested in ourselves and our facial hair?

I suppose I belong to the latter. Buck sake..me and my freaking facial hair!!!

Woman

Amsterdam
An infamous city with an uncompromising beauty and characteristics.
Picturesque canals,
touching history
and mesmerising architecture.
Her extraordinary beauty and her seductive characteristics-
Resemblance of a quirky, confident yet humble woman uncanny.
Woman.
While entrapped in Amsterdam’s beauty,
the very same word kept circling my mind.
Woman.
A visit to Anne Frank’s secret annexe of 2 years
entrenched me with the feeling that
The most powerful weapon for a woman is her Voice
A walk down the lane where her body does all the talking
Made me think that her body perhaps is more acknowledged than her voice.
It may (or may not) be her Choice that led her go behind the glass doors
A choice that young Anne frank certainly did not have.
But as I walked and locked eyes with the young women behind the glass doors
sharing a half smile, longing for one in return
and mentally offering apologies for being on the other side,
watching them like animals behind cages,
I also wondered,
As a woman,
would it be my voice or my choice of selfie that would be more appealing to one’s eyes.

Can ‘Saibol’ fix the Kerala floods?

T & C-1

The resilience I’m blessed with or the deep appreciation I have for nature and its beauty probably stems from the first 10 years I spent in the most amazing place called Alappuzha. With her seductive backwaters, lagoons and canals, and plenty of other picturesque features no wonder Lord Curzon called Alappuzha the “Venice of the East”.

Our family, belonging to a middle-class Christian family, was settled in a place called ‘Chungom’. Our house overlooked our paddy fields and canals. I proudly bear the scars of my childhood – from climbing trees and falling repeatedly, running the fields bare-feet with friends during summer,and by getting stomped on by a vast amount of people during ‘Mullakkal Chireppu’ (local carnival) . My fathers pure passion for ‘vallam kali’ (Nehru Trophy Boat Race) and competing in the Nehru Trophy as a captain of their boat for one too many years also meant that Nehru trophy, ‘kuttanadan punchayille’ song, the competitiveness and the innate resilience from constantly losing the first place (Sorry daddy!) are all well inherited by me and my sisters.

There was one other thing that was a constant companion during these 10 years- ‘Saibol cream’. House built near acres of paddy fields meant that, during monsoon seasons fields flooded, and in no time, the water would be inside our houses. Us kids loved it- swimming and “trying” to catch fish, why would we mind it?!.

Even though we ‘loved’ it, every morning when you had to get out of bed or go to the bathroom, it took sheer amount of will power and a good couple of minutes before putting the feet down in the cold water. And at night, it itched like there’s no tomorrow.

We grew up with our Ammachi (grandmother) during these years. Shed be walking in the water all day running the house and at night, her toes would be itchy with all the bacteria and she would rub ‘Saibol’ in between her toes.

I experienced this for 10 years..my Ammachi may be for over 60 years after marrying into a family from Alappuzha in her early 20’s. She was accustomed to floods and water and stayed fearless…till this monsoon season. After fleeing her house, going to her oldest daughters and then to her youngest (due to her oldest daughters house being also flooded), at the age of 88, I heard fear in my Ammachis voice for the first time and I could do absolutely nothing about it.

My family house was rebuilt 10 years ago so high from the ground that they never had water inside the house for over a decade. Water still went inside. It was over knee high of my uncle who is 6 ft high. He had to abandon the house, sell all their much beloved animals who were their family members and take rescue.

Now the mentioning of the class again, this is a middle class family who were able to have their house built appropriately according to the area. Now, for those who were unable to afford that..I will leave it up to you to imagine where their house is now apart from pointing out the obvious that ‘Kuttanadu’, a part of Alappuzha, rich with culture, characteristics and Love is pretty much gone. If you were to visit a house is Kuttanadu or Alappuzha..you wouldn’t have gone back home without a full stomach and may be some ‘tharavu curry’ to take back with you.

And if you know anything about a Kerala curry, you know that its a perfect blend and balance of spices and ingredients that just makes the most amazing curry- an imbalance of any one ingredient can cause trouble for instance, chilli or salt.

In the past few days, people have been extremely kind, generous and helpful in Kerala and outside Kerala. Regardless of cultural, geographical, relihious or scoial boundaries, people came together, like a perfect mix. From a kind Sikh individual from Perth, Australia who raised £1000 to School and University students who have given up whatever little they had in order to save Kerala, I have enough to restore my faith in humanity.

And the next time you eat a tharavu curry from Alappuzha (and I any other delicious kerala curry as I dont eat duck), I hope you and I both be reminded of how all the perfect incredients came together and made a good curry during this crisis (if you know, you know).

One thing people of Kuttanadu, Alappuzha and Kerala are good at is working hard. Like them, I along with my fellow British Malayali youth, we will commit to raising even more funds, to help rebuild our homeland, Kerala, as I think ‘Saibol’ cream is just not going to be enough to able to fix the damages of this flood.

https://www.gofundme.com/sy6kg-kerala-flood-relief-fund

Summer without my cherry blossom

The very thing that I kept admiring every morning and evening and what I looked forward to the most this summer had been “trimmed” to the core. Why? Because this cherry blosson tree stood in someones way and blocked the ‘sun’ while he was sitting out with his phone in his newly done patio area. He demanded the landlord to cut it down completely who tactfully negotiated to “trim” it down. Now, Im aware that he is entitled to enjoy being out in the sun on his phone just like how im entitled to enjoy a cherrry blossom tree out of my window. What upsets me is that he values his money, his sun and his enjoyment over a tiny tree that took years to grow. Saddest thing? He is not on his own. We will continue to complain about the snow, the climate change and global warming..but the reality is when it comes to our own enjoyment..an innocent tree will be cut, for yours, mine and his sake!!
#Humanity

Fighting social injustice in my dream

I struggled a little bit to get out of bed this morning. Why you ask? Oh its just because I was up saving lives in my dreams last night.

Dreams are a funny lil thang. They offer you entertainment, moral lessons, creepy feelings and sometimes leave you with feeling rather bewildered. This certainly was the case for me this morning with my dream from last night.

So…….. Myself, my 2 sisters, and someone else (might have been my cousin) were at a family/family friends’ house party that was right beside our house. We were all high school children and had an exam the next day (😐). In the tiny room that we were hanging out there was another girl who was of a similar age to us. She dressed differently and looked different from us. She had a scarf over head with some jewellery covering her forehead. One of my crew members got talking to her and learnt that she was from some part of Africa. The girl was taken away from her home and was forced to become someones bride. Her ‘prospective groom’ was somewhere in the house, a face that she might have never seen before and a man probably born atleat 15 or 20 years before she did.

When I got up to leave the house party and go back to my house (to do the revision I am sure :/), one of my crew members asked me ‘why dont you take ‘her’ with you as well?’

Nothing was said. We thought of well devised plans to sneak her out of the house through the back way without any adults seeing us. And we did. With great difficulty ofcourse (mainly because of her anklets that were really noisy). We gave her a big tub of celebrations for the road (that definitely would be plenty to last till Africa!). This took all night apparently and we ended up getting back home at 8ish the next morning (missing the exam ofcourse!).

We look over to the house next to us where the party was held and see that the celebrations lid was lying on the ground. We go into the house, and see our father standing in the hall way. I say to him that the exam was hard and walk away. He suspects nothing. Next thing I know, my middle sister who is not as talented as i am in lying or being sneaky says to him that she heard his friends new child bride got away with a tub of celebrations last night! 😑. He looks bewildered.

We go to our room. And i say we need to come up with our responses to this and learn the same thing so we wont say anything different to the adults.

Fast forward to the climax (or slow forward); its the 16th century where me and my sisters were dressed in white and head all shaven traveling in a vehicle to the house where the party was held. We were being punished because we were women who did something horrible?! 😑

They open the door and let us in. We see the girl we tried to rescue standing there. She got caught half way. They lock the door behind us. She smiles at us. And l smile back thinking dyamnnn we gonna have a goòd time here!!!.

Conclusion:

1. Child marriage, exams, illtreatment towards women- Not acceptable to Archana Mathew.

2. Archana Mathew’s dreams should be made into movies and nominated for Oscar.

The End.

For real.

Extra Marital Affair

I vow not to be embarassed or self-conscious when talking about this or admitting it in a blog post. 

Extra Marital Affairs

Now, I take the liberty in assuming that I’m not the only one who has fought hard against extra marital affair offers from people. This is something that I struggled with for the past one year.

He was cheeky, cocky, and a complete ‘class-clown’. His loud, inapproriate and sexist jokes often turned heads in disbelief. He never shyed away from asking me publicly to leave my husband for him or saying that the only thing that was missing in his life was me. Regardless of turning down his charming proposals politely many a times, there was something about him. I liked him. And I knew that from the first day that I met him.

I wasnt ever going to accept his proposals though. It wasnt because of my husband, or because of our age difference of 66 years or the fact that he was a member at the elderly cafe I was volunteering at. Its just that we differed massively in the ways we took our teas. No woman likes a man whos tea is weak. Period. 

 As I dressed up all nice and walked up to the cafe this morning expecting to be cat-called by him, the only thing that was waiting for me was the sad news that he passed away on friday.

To the man who made me blush with his proposals, had no care in the world when speaking his mind or when taking weak teas; tea, was the only thing that was weak in your life. Not your character, jokes, or your proposals..

I will miss you. 

I had a dream

So I had a dream lastnight.

And unlike Martin Luther king, I dreamt about travelling to space along with my husband on a banana boat. 

Now, to get yourself going, you just have to get thrown up in the air (no trouble!). So the journey is long and tricky and it takes days to travel through the dark empty sky on a banana boat. But we presevere. And at one point, i look up and see trillions of stars up above. I look at my husband and say ‘Im so grateful that you are here’. And the next thing we know is that we are starting to float in the air. Gravitys lost (!). Loving every moment of it till the moment is finished and we are back on earth in a dark shady corner. 

A lady in white coat (insert wtf*) tells us my parents were in the space ahead of us and they will be around looking for us. We decide to get ourselves back up in the air on the banana boat lets not forget. Off we go again. Same journey. Same outcome.

After a few times, we end up indulging in a lot of rather unusual but apparently necessary rituals to get ourselves back up in the air. This involves a horse biting someones looong bundle of hair and then me taking the hair bundle off its mouth, circling it and throwing it up in the air(insert wtf* x 2).

‘Are you getting up?’ I hear the voice of my space voyage partner at 6am and my space journey comes to an end.

I will never know what happened after i threw the hair in the air but lets just hope that we ended up in space and reunited with my parents.

The end.

‘You may say I’m a dreamer

But I’m not the only one

I hope someday you will join us

And the world will be as one’

Much dreaded day of the year!

A much dreaded day is coming up for me. My birthday. A day that causes stress in me, my family and friends. This year though, instead of getting gifts, cards, messages and money, I decided to do something different. Below here are some of the causes that I believe in. It would mean the world to me, and make my day and my life so special if you can do any of these for me. Please do message me (privately) if you are able to do any of these, or your own thing if you’d like, and I will cherish that in my life forever.
Bring a box of chocolate to the local ambulance, fire station, A&E (or police station if you dare!)
Give motivational books, posters or materials to the local youth hostel near you. Alternatively, send me a donation for buying these things or send these things to me and I will personally deliver them to the local youth hostel that I work in.
Homeless people- 1, Give a fiver or tenner to a homeless person. 2, Create a care package with snacks, sandwiches, toiletries etc and give it to 5 homeless people. 3, Get to know a homeless person, get to know his/her circumstances and get him a sandwich of his choice for 4 weeks.
Donate money or clothes to your local Barnardos charity for children (or any children’s charity of your choice)
A donation for the older people’s cafe (LinkLiving)that I volunteer at (I will specify what the money will be used for later on).
Help elderly with their shopping.
Ask a shop assistant how his or her day has been.
If you have a grandparent who lives near you or with you, give him/her a hug and a kiss.
Leave a compliment under a young girls profile picture of herself.
Leave a note on your rubbish bin for the man/woman who collects your rubbish thanking them for their service.
Finally, if you are religious, say a little prayer for me to be always grateful for the life I have and blessings I have in life. And for my catholic friends and relatives, may be light a little candle or say a decade of rosary/divine mercy chaplet for me?
Thank you
I will be sure to have the best birthday this year!

A new day, a new start..an answer to my predicament.

6am,

Its dark, its cold,

And your life is on hold.

Muscles hurt, brain is frozen,

And you want to stay in bed for a reason.

Just a little bit more,

I’d wake up in 5

And it will be a new day,

A new start.

An answer to my predicament.

But hey,

That aint how it goes

I aint a snoozer

I dont wanna be a looser.

Hurt those muscles more,

Unfreeze the brain to the core, 

Put your reason to stay in bed on hold, 

And it will be a new day,

A new start,

An answer to my predicament.