The fallen leaf

A mundane cold october morning, nothing in the diary apart from a loose plan to drop by the senior citizens group that I developed 2 years ago. Respecting my lie-in-day privileges, I woke up after 8. Succumbing to my sluggishness, I decided to skip the group and indulge in a Friends and duvet day instead. Albeit Friends is still Friends when you watch it back-to-back for the 50th time, you still need a ‘break’ (if you get it, you get it) so I watched ‘Same kind of different as me’ – I laughed, cried, reflected, planned. Thoughts crowded my head, so I decided to get away from my habitat, go for a drive, taking ‘Becoming Michelle Obama(cause you know, I love it) the Primal Wound (cause I have to), Cecilia Ahern (just incase), my journal and grateful journal and a pen with me.

Largs. A drive through the mountains which eventually opens up the view of the sea on the left hand side, rocky mountains on the right hand and the blue velvety hills up ahead.

My eyes and brain were going crazy- so many breathtaking things to register. Blue and pink sky, hills, sea, seals, ferry boats (even though mind did wonder about the possible impact this causes the sea, welcome to my environmental conscious brain!). But driving around looking right and left is not the way to go about in life, so the task was to find a spot. Having failed to pick a new spot, I retracted to my usual spot, parked the car and went upto sit on the bright blue bench near by with my blanket, music and books.

Braveheart song starts playing in my ears when two lil black fur babies, out of nowhere, run up to me excitedly. Although freezing cold, their playfulness, fight for my attention, and the good 20 mins chat with their owner warmed me inside. Went back into the car after they left because you know, hypothermia is real.

Didnt read, didnt write, didnt do anything else apart from sitting in the car thinking of the time when I caught sight of a little fallen leaf that was stuck on the cobwebs. A leaf that serves no purposes. But when the wind blows, it dances. It danced to the tune that was playing in my car and provided me with right entertainment during the red light.
A fallen leaf that became the dancing leaf. Huh.

The fallen leaf that became the dancing leaf for me made me smile then and it made me smile today thinking about it.

Nature, rather generous in her offering, gives us plenty to see, feel and enjoy but our eyes often fail to see them. With that thought, I decided to head back home. After about 50 yards, I see a couple in their 70s probably walking slowly on the other side of the road. Arm in arm. Nothing unusual. But then I take another look. The man has shades on, a walking stick, taking fearful smaller steps, relying heavily on his partner to be the eyes for him. To be the eyesight he lacks.

Woman

Amsterdam
An infamous city with an uncompromising beauty and characteristics.
Picturesque canals,
touching history
and mesmerising architecture.
Her extraordinary beauty and her seductive characteristics-
Resemblance of a quirky, confident yet humble woman uncanny.
Woman.
While entrapped in Amsterdam’s beauty,
the very same word kept circling my mind.
Woman.
A visit to Anne Frank’s secret annexe of 2 years
entrenched me with the feeling that
The most powerful weapon for a woman is her Voice
A walk down the lane where her body does all the talking
Made me think that her body perhaps is more acknowledged than her voice.
It may (or may not) be her Choice that led her go behind the glass doors
A choice that young Anne frank certainly did not have.
But as I walked and locked eyes with the young women behind the glass doors
sharing a half smile, longing for one in return
and mentally offering apologies for being on the other side,
watching them like animals behind cages,
I also wondered,
As a woman,
would it be my voice or my choice of selfie that would be more appealing to one’s eyes.

Life Motto Revelations

It’s often difficult to take new steps in life. I’ve been dying to get myself back into dance this year. It was getting to the stage where it was shameful to think, never mind say to someone, that I once used to do some dancing. I lack confidence on the dance floor and find it easier to just say ‘I suck at dance’ and just do my usual chicken dancing. But today, I went for my first dance lesson. I was rather anxious to go there, dance, meet new people etc.  Life motto No 1: ‘If the thought of doing something makes you nervous, do exactly just that.’ I did just that and I’m glad I did.

Now the dancing lesson was intense and I somehow managed bits n bobs. It did not improve my dancing or confidence right away, and I don’t know if it ever will (although I’m hoping it will otherwise world will be a darker place with my chicken dance!). What it did do was make me reiterate my life motto no 2: ‘be what you want to be’ and implement it. I did just that and I’m glad I did.